- Notes
& Shorts from around the world
The Consequences of Priestly Celebration
Irish priests have been
warned that celebrating more than one mass a day might push them
over the limit for drink driving. Father Brian d’Arcy said
that, owing to a chronic shortage of priests on the island, many
are having to drive between parishes to deliver the Eucharist.
Ireland has a zero tolerance approach to drink driving, and priests
who repeatedly sip from the chalice may end up with illegal levels
of alcohol in their blood.
The Wonders of Botox
A grandmother who lost her voice 15 years ago has found it
again thanks to Botox injections. Phyllis Yates, from Lowestoft,
Suffolk, woke up speechless one morning in 1993, but it was only
last November that doctors diagnosed her condition as laryngeal
dystonia, a condition that causes involuntary spasms of the vocal
cords. A course of Botox has relaxed the cords, and restored
the 73 year old’s speech. “I’ve got a lot to catch
up on,” she said. “I’m putting my husband in his
place.”
Nodding off while Driving
Two pilots on an overnight flight admitted nodding off at
the controls. The pair, who were flying an Airbus A319 from Baltimore
to Denver, were only woken by frantic cries from an air traffic
controller, who noticed they were coming in to land too high
and too fast.
Tarzan’s Yell
His distinctive yell has been declared public property. The
estate of author Edgar Rice Burroughs had wanted to trademark
the sound, described as “sustain, followed by ululation,
followed by sustain, but at a higher frequency, followed by ululation,
followed by sustain at the starting frequency.” The E.U.’s
Office for Harmonisation in the Internal Market ruled that there
was no way to patent a sound without a musical score.
Great Railway Feats
“Your article describes Eurostar’s transfer as
‘the biggest move in the history of Britain’s rail
industry’.”
“In 1872, the entire South Wales Railway network had to
replace Brunel’s broad gauge with the standard gauge. Some
260 miles of track were relaid during a single week-end.”
Twenty-five years later, the Great Western changed 213 miles
of track between Paddington and Penzance over one week-end.”
“Compared with those feats, relocating staff and equipment
from Waterloo to St. Pancras is no big deal.” - from John
Carter, Bromley, Kent.
Statistic of the Week
80% of the world zippers are made in one Chinese town.
Bon Mots
“If you don’t read the newspapers, you are uninformed
- if you do read the newspapers, you are misinformed.” -
author and humorist, Mark Twain.
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